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FUNNY and true!GOD:Frank, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there on the planet? What happened to the dandelions, violets, milkweeds and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long-lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honey bees and flocks of songbirds. I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But, all I see are these green rectangles.St. FRANCIS:It's the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites. They started calling your flowers 'weeds' and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.GOD:Grass? But, it's so boring. It's not colorful. It doesn't attract butterflies, birds and bees; only grubs and sod worms. It's sensitive to temperatures. Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?ST. FRANCIS:Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and. I shrugged."I'll miss her, she was a lot of fun, and was a great dancer. But she was just too young for me, and except for sex and dancing, we really didn't share many interests. I knew I had an expiration date going in, I just didn't expect it to be so soon."Cathy wanted to know why I became involved if I knew it wasn't going to last. "She was fun. Capable of holding a conversation. And she was a tiger in bed. I wasn't looking for anything else." No serious relationships in your past?" A wife, years ago. She left me for a man with more money, wanting the high life, I think. Called me a loser and said I'd never amount to anything in this life. It kind of soured me on anything permanent." I looked around the room, at the three couples, Dorian and Leah, snuggled together, Eric and Savanna lightly touching, Tory and Cathy sitting so close Tory was almost on her lap. I was the odd man out. With that thought I prepared to leave.Tory grinned. "I think she may have miscalculated in this.
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